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Signs of An Abusive Relationship

Signs of an Abusive Relationship

  • Does he have an unpredictable temper?  Is he like Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde?
  • Does he blame you for everything?
  • Does he bring up the past things you’ve done?
  • Have you had to stop seeing friends and family?
  • Does he monitor and want to control what you do and who you see?
  • Does he monopolize your time?
  • Does he control your finances?
  • Does he accuse you of being unfaithful?
  • Does his personality change when in private vs. when in public?


What are some red flags to look out for in a potential dating partner or spouse?

  • He wants to move too quickly into the relationship.
  • Early in the relationship, he flatters you constantly, seems “too good to be true.”
  • He wants you all to himself; insists that you stop spending time with your friends or family.
  • He insists that you stop participating in hobbies or activities, wants you to quit school or quit your job.
  • He asks you for money or to use your credit card.
  • He is excessively jealous and accuses you of being unfaithful.
  • He wants to know where you are all the time and frequently calls, emails, and texts you throughout the day, or comes to your work unannounced.
  • He criticizes or puts you down; says you are crazy, stupid, or unattractive, or that no one else would ever want or love you.
  • He takes no responsibility for his or her behavior and blames others.
  • He has a history of abusing others.
  • He blames the failure of previous relationships on his former partner; for example, “My ex was totally crazy.”
  • He begins to be violent – shoves, pushes, slaps, pinches, etc. that start to escalate to more intense abuse.



  • You are not alone. A quarter of all women experience an abusive relationship at some point in their lives.
  • You are not the cause of someone else’s violent behavior.
  • You do not deserve to be abused.
  • You have the right to expect respect.
  • You have the right to seek help.
  • You have the right to make your own choices, including the decision to leave an abusive relationship.


Myths About Domestic Violence