Signs of an Abusive Relationship
- Does he have an unpredictable temper? Is he like Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde?
- Does he blame you for everything?
- Does he bring up the past things you’ve done?
- Have you had to stop seeing friends and family?
- Does he monitor and want to control what you do and who you see?
- Does he monopolize your time?
- Does he control your finances?
- Does he accuse you of being unfaithful?
- Does his personality change when in private vs. when in public?
What are some red flags to look out for in a potential dating partner or spouse?
- He wants to move too quickly into the relationship.
- Early in the relationship, he flatters you constantly, seems “too good to be true.”
- He wants you all to himself; insists that you stop spending time with your friends or family.
- He insists that you stop participating in hobbies or activities, wants you to quit school or quit your job.
- He asks you for money or to use your credit card.
- He is excessively jealous and accuses you of being unfaithful.
- He wants to know where you are all the time and frequently calls, emails, and texts you throughout the day, or comes to your work unannounced.
- He criticizes or puts you down; says you are crazy, stupid, or unattractive, or that no one else would ever want or love you.
- He takes no responsibility for his or her behavior and blames others.
- He has a history of abusing others.
- He blames the failure of previous relationships on his former partner; for example, “My ex was totally crazy.”
- He begins to be violent – shoves, pushes, slaps, pinches, etc. that start to escalate to more intense abuse.
- You are not alone. A quarter of all women experience an abusive relationship at some point in their lives.
- You are not the cause of someone else’s violent behavior.
- You do not deserve to be abused.
- You have the right to expect respect.
- You have the right to seek help.
- You have the right to make your own choices, including the decision to leave an abusive relationship.